Poly days are officially over

I AM FINALLY DONE

Submitted the final report of my whole polytechnic life and the feel is (Y) 

All those moments of tonning at night to study to chiong report, and 3 years of polytechnic ended just like this. That feeling is really beyond description but those memories in school were just awesome. 

Bad experiences are life lessons. But really glad that everyone pulled through it in whichever ways that suited them. But I have to admit, the way I pulled through it was so extreme that I'm officially burnt from studying. I can do well, but do I really enjoy it? NO. But the world is so realistic, results still have to come first before passion and whatever. #realityisabitch 

Now that we have reached the period where we can just simply countdown to the last ship call together with like our 10 fingers, I kind of have mixed feelings about it. 

I am elated to leave the company but sad to leave the company I have during internship (did I use the words correctly HAHA) 

The last month of internship was quite different from what I've experienced for the past 5 months tho. Is it a curse? 

Some of the attitudes changed and it was really hard to understand what exactly went wrong. I can't emphasize more on how I dislike changes that makes life even more difficult cause I don't know how to cope with being replaced and I'll just simply back off. Humans are really complicated. Why do we have so much of feelings.  

But putting that aside, internship till now was good! Get to meet all sorts of guys, literally hot guys to the one who will always be there for me. 

Michael and Croft. HAHAHA but oh my goshhh the croft...when is he even coming back. 

It was really chance and thanks to Zul, who openly helped me to compliment him after me telling Zul that this Croft is good looking..... but he's really good loooking. I don't easily melt for angmohz but I just couldn't maintain..... 

We do have night shifts when the ship stays in our terminal until night. But of course, it can be quite dead and we're just there for the sake of being there. So that means, fun time! Since internship is going to end and we can't be that guai before we don't even have opportunities to do fun stuff hence we decided to bring alive museum to MBCCS. 

Valentines day has nothing to do with me, but I exceptionally like this year's!  

Cause I got to spend it with le buddy at wharf and it was sooooooooooo good. 

No words can describe how much I love this girl! Although we are not from the same clique, I know our relationship was somehow something like underground. You don't see it on the surface but you know its there. International Business got us started and we pulled through BCRM together and here we are. Someone once said, we will only be close because of internship. Once internship ends, our friendship ends too. But looking at our relationship now, I really don't see that coming. I can see how much she really understand me and my internal struggles. Just so glad to have the two of them with me during internship.

Valentine day don't just end there. Took half day leave to chiong to my annual affair during CNY period. 

CHINGAY 2015! 

I don't know what happened too, but felt that I've changed somehow after internship happened. 

For that moment, it felt as though I gave up on everything. I didn't get angry, frustrated over ultimately screwed plans. Or maybe I've just matured up to accept that plans are meant to be screwed; and that's how we learn from our mistakes. Plans were really really screwed a big time. Every single year, different plans screwed up different ways. Being in LO in transport, we don't work alone. We have to liaise with the Parade management, and also OG for the buses. Once a party screws it up, it means instant change in plans and make do with anything that works the best at the moment. I've witnessed people exploding for no reasons, releasing all her anger and frustration on innocent victims and I couldn't say anything because I was in the middle. Felt soooooooooooo bad and someone told me "he'll be ok, if you didn't get scolded before then you haven't really done events before" which is so damn freaking true. Events are all about being scolded and coping with that.

I know I used to be damn short-tempered and once plans start  screwing up, I start screwing myself and my peers and volunteer leaders out too. But I realized this year I just chilled out and calm people around....and its all because I accepted that being angry over screwed plans doesn't help. Since its gonna be the last time so why not just enjoy the process of correcting what went wrong and make sure things don't screw a big time. Everyone have their own point and own style of doing things so I should prolly respect the lead at the area, even when his plans didn't really make sense to me, cause he's the one in charge of the area, I'll follow his plans.. If not, yeah, receiving 5 different setss of instructions within an hour and people screaming into your faces. WOW. #chingaypains 

Back to school clique! 

Met up with them for Shauna's birthday.... and its like the first time or so since internship started.

I have to admit I am really busy and caught up with so many things in my life. 

That eye bag game and horrible complexion........le sigh. 

But pleased that everyone is still coping well......except Cole that changed boy.

And yes, 9 days ago my yunho came to Singapore..

Of course, I've tried. Grateful that Emelynn helped me too really touched but...I have to admit that I don't have the luck for this kind of things like tickets, really none at all. Especially the ones that I worship and love. 

Missed their arrival. Thought that their event was a closed event when it was at some open space and I had my off day. Chased them for their departure but don't even get to see their shadows. And yunho was in a really bad mood. But thanks a million to those who went with me to try my luuck, really appreciate it a million. Can't express how much I was feeling that night. 

 

Now that report is submitted, here comes life decisions and uni admissions. I really suck suck suck in making decisions. So people, stop asking me what I wanna do with my life before I end it like this. Ultimate hate this questions "so what are you intending to do whats your plans" then when I'm telling them "oh i'm going to continue studying tourism" then they start telling me hospitality and tourism doesn't need a degree. Then ok fine maybe i'll work then they'll go "huh why don't want go for degree like something else" 

HEY PEOPLE SHUT. I'm the one studying whatever you're saying, when I can't cope with it, who's gonna bear responsibility//  think about it. 

I know I won't ever do well in things that I don't like. Look at my secondary school results and poly's. 

GIVE ME A BREAK GUYS.